Something I think a lot about is how you should spend your life as a young person. I’m talking mostly about the ages of 17-22. This isn’t to say if you’re over these ages you aren’t young anymore, but a lot of what I think sets the foundation for your future self happens in these few years.

Obviously, the irony in this article is that I’m on the I can’t comment on 3 of the years, since I’m 18. Maybe I’ll write back in a couple. But for the 17/18/19 years, I think I have some advice, or at least some learnings - on how I spent them.

The first thing I think you should do a lot when you’re young is thinking. You should think a lot about a wide variety of things. About your interests, about what you want out of school, about if you want to go to school at all. About what you value in people, about the type of friends you want and the people you surround yourself with. All of these things won’t give clear answers, and you may not be in a position to really say much about any (if not, all) of them. And that’s okay. The point of thinking about these things isn’t to lock in some answer that you’ll have for the rest of your life. The point of doing this is to get acquainted with these sorts of topics. For a long time I didn’t like thinking about my future and it sort of overwhelmed me, and it still does. The notion of having a 5 year plan and a 10 year plan never made sense to me. You shouldn’t think that far ahead. Not only can a lot change, but by setting some sort of expectation for your future - anything less than it seems like a failure. So think, but think about these things with the understanding with the change and also with the understanding that the act itself is more important than the thoughts that amount.

This next one is sort of extension of the first but one that took me a long time to realize. It’s to spend time with people that you enjoy being around. I guess this took me a long time to realize because I was always a little introverted and didn’t like hanging out tons. Recently I’ve tried to make an effort to do more things with the people that are important to me. This advice honestly applies to any age, but it’s really important when you’re young because it really keeps you sane. I felt like when I kept to myself more, even though it was easier to do things I felt like I was really lacking something - and it was that social interaction. I still find it sort of hard do this often and I think it’s something I’m getting better at. So I guess the short is: hangout with your friends?

Onto some other stuff. I think when you’re young you should make use of the fact that you can work hard. What you work on is less important than the fact that you are working hard. Be it in school, in a club, on other projects, on work on anything really - working hard is important. The reason I say it doesn’t matter what you work hard on is simple. What you work hard on is likely to change - not just because your interests will change but because you will learn more. As time goes on you get a more advanced understanding, such that your interests will shift to what you want to know more deeply. The big reason why you want to do this, though, is because you want to know how hard you can work. It’s perfectly fine to learn that you don’t like working long extended hours on something. Or that the so called “grind” is not for you. It’s better to figure this out early on, than to figure it out through some sort of experience where you have no choice but to see it out (like an internship).

You should learn to not know the answers to things. This used to be such a tough thing for me to do. In high-school, I had so much figured out I was really that 5 year plan type of person. I had it all mapped out, from the university to the job to the place to settle to the retirement plan. One university rejection through a wrench into my plans and into my morale when it came to this stuff. It’s so important to be okay with not knowing what you want to do, or what you are interested in professionally or personally. That is what these ages are for. I came into university thinking I was going to be a software engineer. It took one coding class for me to figure out this wasn’t going to happen. Something I think I’m interested in product and sometimes I think I’m interested in something else. Nowadays, I don’t really know what I want to do in the future and I think I’ve become okay with that. There’s something enjoyable about having a clean canvas to just do what you want with. That’s what university feels like to me. You can always switch to a new canvas and start something fresh.

Reading a lot is important. Reading sort of helps with what I just talked about. And when I say help, I mean make things less clear. And this is a good thing. Even when I read fiction, I feel like it exposes me to so many new things that I never really thought about before. This in turn changes the way I feel about future plans and what I want to do in life. The thing about reading is once again, that it doesn’t really matter what you read. In-fact, you should probably not try to read too many things you “enjoy”. That misses the point in the sense that you are trying to open up your mind to new ideas and perspectives. By only reading topics and authors and subject-matter you take personal interest in, you prevent yourself from learning about stuff you don’t know much about.

You should move out for university if you can. I have a piece dedicated to this and I’ll post it another time.

Writing a lot is important too. I try to write everyday. I make it a priority in addition to schoolwork, chores, etc. I think it’s important because to write is to think. If you write a lot you think a lot, and if you write well - you think well. It’s also reflective, it makes you think about the questions I talked about earlier. Once again, what you write about isn’t as important as writing.

I’ve repeated that last phrase so much maybe it’s something on it’s own. I guess: don’t think too much about the things that you are doing. Something I struggle with nowadays, I think too much about the stuff that I’m doing. Don’t just go through the motions but also just show up and be present. Most of the time, the worry that I exert into my tasks doesn’t make them any better. I feel like as long as you are doing something, in my case: going to class, doing your best, studying, doing something on the side. That’s more than enough.

Extended upon, be kind to yourself and be kind to others. There’s already competition in the world and if you attend university you will be the first to know it. Don’t undercut people and don’t try to make everything a battle of jobs and success. We already face tons of that in other domains. Learn to be kind to those around you and be happy for what others have going for them. Be kind to others and don’t expect anything in return. You stand to gain so much from being selfless just by practicing it. Be kind to yourself, understand that you won’t always have the dream job or the dream grades, and that’s okay. It’s okay to fail, it’s okay to not have stuff figured out (as said earlier).

Life has a very unique way of working itself out and all that matters most of the time is that you let it take it’s course.